Talk show host Ellen DeGeneres takes on Abercrombie & Fitch on Friday. We think her monologue is so powerful — we are including it here in it’s entirety”
“I don’t know if you’ve heard about this, but there’s a bit of controversy surrounding Abercrombie & Fitch right now. You’ve probably heard about it if you’re a teenager, or if you have a teenager, or if you like to wear shorts where most of your butt hangs out.
“The CEO of the company announced that his stores will stop selling clothing for women larger than a size 10. Well, hear him out. He has a really good reason. Because, according to him, anyone who’s a plus size isn’t cool enough to shop in Abercrombie & Fitch. You know what I say to that? Oh, Fitch, please.
“I don’t even know where to begin with this one. First of all, since when is something over a size 10 a plus size? Second of all, I’m not sure I trust their sizing. Just to give you an idea – here’s the largest shirt they sell for a woman. And here’s the smallest. This is who they want to shop in there. Let me warn you if you buy this you should hang dry it or lay it flat because it shrinks if you put it in the dryer.
“It’s not just Abercrombie and Fitch. I’ve noticed a trend in women’s clothing that’s ridiculous. There’s a size zero, which I don’t understand. Zero is nothing. Knock knock. Who’s there? No one.
Now they have a size double zero. What are we aspiring to? “Honey, do these jeans make my butt look invisible?”
“Beauty isn’t between a size 0 and 8. It’s not a number at all. It’s not physical. I mean, I know that when a certain someone became a CoverGirl a lot of people were surprised. But now everyone agrees that Sofia Vergara is beautiful.
“Here’s what I say. If you really want clothing from a cool place, I have three words for you. The Ellen Shop. You can order them online 24 hours a day. That means you can even order them while your family’s sleeping and you’re hiding in the pantry eating double-stuffed Oreos.
“I know a lot of kids watch this show, so I wanna say one more thing to you all. What you look like on the outside is not what makes you cool. At all. I mean, I had a mullet and I wore parachute pants for a long, long time. And I’m doing OK.
“What’s important is that you’re healthy and you’re happy. That’s the most important thing. And now that I’ve made myself clear, I would like to dance.”